Specks of Time
Howdy y’all,
Happy August! The end of summer is coming up and let me tell you, I could not be more excited about it. Spending the Tennessee summer in a canvas and plastic tent does sometimes make me feel that I am being roasted alive. Whenever I moved up here, for some reason I had in my head that Tennessee weather would be different than Texas, I was very wrong. This heat rivals East Texas heat in my opinion. Well at about halfway through the season here at this location, I have to say that although this job has been anything but normal, the chaos is something that I truly enjoy about this job. The constant change and problem-solving that occurs helps me stay on my toes and not become bored with this job, which is something that I truly love and something that I have struggled with in the past. Anyways as this season continues and my journey in Tennessee presses onwards, I have found that although I have been here for 5 months already, there is so much more to see, explore, and witness through the National Park and the cities surrounding it.
This past Sunday, the Perseid meteor shower graced the Great Smoky Mountains with its brilliance. Although the meteor shower has been in the area for the past few weeks or so, this past Sunday was predicted to be the best time to see it in action. So after midnight, in the waking minutes of August 12, my partner and I drove into the Great Smoky Mountain National Park with every hope of seeing this beautiful display of shooting stars searing through the night sky. As we wound our way up to the Newfound Gap Overlook, the forest becoming darker and darker the further we travelled away from civilization which is exactly what I was hoping for. As we parked at the overlook where in the sunlight you can see for miles and admire the beauty of the lush, forested mountains, the absolute lack of any light was quite unsettling, but this is what we wanted. We wanted the pitch black nothingness to ensure the stars would be as bright as possible. So we climbed onto the hood of my car with our preplanned blankets and snacks and waited, the night was clear, the stars were glittering in the black velvet background of the night, and to my surprise, the faint dustiness of the galaxy could be seen. It was a beautiful night, as we laid there waiting for this cosmic spectacle to begin, we enjoyed watching the stars and discussing constellations, aliens, and anything else that happened to pop up. And as the clock ticked closer to 1:00am, it began. A meteor shower is not how they show on tv, it is not thousands of streaks that fly across the sky, but it is still awe inspiring. The meteors started flying across the night sky for a few seconds before burning themselves out, leaving only a tail of fire and space dust in their wake for a few moments before completely disappearing. As I laid there, witnessing my first meteor shower, a line from a wonderful movie popped into my head, “Just a lifetime of fractured moments, contradictions, and confusion. With only a few specks of time where anything actually makes any sense. Then I will cherish these few specks of time with you”.
This quote really resonates with me in many different ways. One, this quote is spoken from a mother to her daughter while the daughter is going through a difficult time and is struggling with understanding her purpose in this life. Two, this quote can be applied to every single person that comes into our lives, it does not have to be romantic, it does not have to be a parental figure, it does not even have to be a long term friendship. It can be put forth to anyone that we deem worthy and that is beautiful to me. Through all of the people we meet and bonds we create and the ones that are a simple fleeting encounter, the few specks of time that make sense in this erratic and chaotic timeline are important, they are special, and they mean something to each one of us. (Side note: the movie this quote is from is “Everything Everywhere All at Once” It is a great movie. Takes a little bit to get into, but by the end it had me crying, sobbing, throwing up from all of the feelings. Highly recommend) The few fleeting specks of time where everything makes sense, the people around us are just as important as the moments are. While everything spins out of control, there is always a moment of time where everything lines up for even a split second and its important to take a second to look around and see who is standing there in the chaos with you because although it may seem like the monstrosity of this life consumes you and only you, there are people standing with you who feel it too. We are never truly alone, despite how lonely we may feel at times. I think this is something that we all need to remember in desperate times.
So as I laid there on the hood of my car, watching these space rocks fly through the air, a speck of time was upon me. And I thought of every person who is a part of my life. Every person I cherish. Every person I enjoy spending time with. And although they were not all in my line of sight, some thousands of miles away, I counted them and counted the memories I have with them. Even the ones I may not have seen in a long time. You are all important to me. You all matter to me and every speck of time that lined up and everything made sense, I am grateful for you being there with me. Thank you all for every impression you made and every memory we have. I am truly appreciative for all of you. I encourage you to look around and take stock of just how important the ones you surround yourself with are. Thank you for reading. I will see you out there.
Natalee